Jayne M. Rose-Vallee
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Tattling versus Telling

One of the first things the Rose-Vallee Children’s Foundation undertook was to create our “Tattling versus Telling” handout. When Heather and I attended the Decatur Book Festival in September 2018, we distributed over 400 copies to parents, teachers, and grandparents. Here’s our flyer. Pass it on.

Tattling versus Telling
What is the difference between telling & tattling?
Telling someone is reporting.
It’s done to keep people safe.
The teller is concerned about safety.
The problem is important and urgent.
Someone could be in danger.
Some adult needs to help solve the problem.
Telling is necessary.
Telling is helpful.
Tattling is when you snitch on someone and the situation is safe.
No one is at risk of being hurt.
Tattling is when you want to get someone in trouble.
Tattling is mean-spirited.
Tattling is not necessary.
Tattling is hurtful.
The problem can be solved without an adult.
When you put someone down to put yourself ahead.
How do you tell an adult about a problem?
Ask to talk with them privately.
Tell the adult you have a problem you need help solving.
Tell the adult about the problem and how it is unsafe,
dangerous, or if someone is hurt.
Ask how you can help to make it better.
Use a low, clear, calm voice when telling an adult.
Take deep breaths.
Tell them it’s about SAFETY.
If someone gets upset because you told and calls you a
tattletale — if it’s about SAFETY — then your
job is to tell. 

Keep telling until you get help!